Editorial Report 9a

For Editorial Report 9a, I chose to compare and contrast between the rough draft and the final draft of my first body paragraph. I thought this was most appropriate because I did the same last week between my introductory and concluding paragraphs.

Rough Cut Versus Final Draft

Audience Questions

• How did the content change (even slightly - details matter!) when you re-edited it? Why do you think the content is being communicated more effectively in the re-edited version?
• There is not only more content in the final draft, but it provides much more support for my argument. Since I added specific quotes from my interviewee and from the journals I was using as examples, the paragraph seems all the more convincing. I also edited grammar and language so that the piece flows much easier.

• How did the form change (even slightly - details matter!) when you re-edited it? Why do you think the form is presenting the content more effectively in the re-edited version?
• Although the piece still only has four paragraphs, it sounds much more like an academic essay. This is because I put in topic and transitional sentences, and overall made edits to any run on sentences.